Lorea Darling is Born

Our beautiful baby girl Lorea Darling came into the world on Saturday, May 26 at 6 in the morning. She is just one week old! We gave birth naturally and it was the most intense, difficult and strangely wonderful physical and mental experience of my life. No words can express the wonder of it all. Her due date had passed and we had spent every waking moment in a constant state of waiting and anticipation. Each day I awoke to a new day without our newborn. In retrospect, I should have surrendered to the unknown and savored those final hours when our family was simply him and I. But we were too excited to meet our little being!
We had a full house on the night she decided to arrive. The family came down to the beach house on Friday for memorial day weekend. We ate lots and lots of fried seafood from our favorite fisherman’s joint in town— not an ideal pre-labor meal! I was stretching after dinner, doing some simple cat/ cow yoga poses in the living room and I heard a soft pop and felt a warm flow of water. I announced with shock that I thought my water had just broken and freaked everyone out! J and I lay in our bed with the lights dim. We dripped lavender oil on the pillows and he read a stream of positive birth affirmations while the contractions started. It felt like subtle cramping but quickly intensified over the next hour. My nerves were softening and the excitement in my belly was building. It was just like the start of a good high— craving skin on skin, rubbing my hands together, breathing slowly and deeply, licking my lips, surrendering to the trip. We called our doula when the contractions were steadily five minutes apart, lasting one minute long for one hour. She arrived at the beach house at 2 in the morning and I was still horizontal on the bed. She encouraged me to get up— an unimaginable notion— but I’m thankful that we did rise. We put sweaters on and walked along the streets. The air was salty and misty. It was that hazy moment before the rains come in by the sea. J walked along side of us and whenever a contraction would come on, I would reach for the doula and lean on her, squeezing my hands into her waist, leaning back into J, bending my knees, swaying toward the ground. They had to remind me to breathe through each one. I was beginning to moan and ache and turn really inward, so inward, my eyes were closed for most of the journey. A deer appeared in the middle of the road, that was all I noticed. That and the cool air on my skin. We labored at home for just another hour but it felt like I was progressing quickly. The ride to the hospital is when I really let go— I felt free and unrestricted and screamed and groaned the entire way. I didn’t hear music or voices or passing cars. I didn’t see lights or streets or swaying trees.
It was 4am when we entered our hospital room and I stayed active throughout the contractions. I was six centimeters dilated at that point and I wailed, I don’t think I can do this. But there was no alternative! And I could do it. So I carried on. J was by my side the entire time. I ripped at his shirt, sunk my teeth into his flesh, buried my face in his neck. He said, baby you’re amazing, bring our baby into the world. I tried hot water in the shower to ease the intensity and it really helped. At that point my moans were getting higher and higher— I had reached transition. I was almost there. The urge to push came on so strong. I remember Mama Charlotte showing me how to push my breath up through my mouth toward the sky to stave off the pushing sensation. I just wanted to push as hard as I could. And when I was ready to, it felt so good, just as the birth stories in the Ina May book had said it would. The nurses directive was so helpful, I couldn’t have done it without their wisdom. I buried my chin into my chest and bared down into the bed and pushed with everything I had left. I imagined her leaving my body with every push. And I made it there quickly. I thought I would sense if our baby was a boy or girl in that moment but I had no gut feeling on it. When she did make her sweet, sweet entrance, J said, here’s our baby girl and I smiled. I was so relieved that she looked so healthy! She was born so wild and free. Lorea Darling was 8 lbs 10 oz and 21 inches long. She was dark and rosey. I called her our little eskimo. Jason whispered in her ear, we made you.
Having a baby brings you into the present moment like nothing else. There is nowhere else you’d rather be. We kill hours staring at her little features: her perfectly shaped head full of dark hair, her big eyebrows and heart-shaped lips. We caress her skin, covered in fuzz, and sing Simon+Garfunkel to her sweetly, rocking her to sleep. She coos and stretches when she wakes from a deep sleep, sucking on her long fingers. She instantly at ease in her daddy’s arms. We love her with everything we’ve got.

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5 thoughts on “Lorea Darling is Born

  1. myka

    Girl, that was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever read. So happy for you, your hubby, and your sweet baby girl. xoxo!

    Reply

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